sing with me

October 5, 2007

-original plan of RAM in ’85 was to take over the economy
o they were ready for power grab
o responsible for the series of coup’s
o planned to have a coup d’etat in ’86 but when marcos declared Snap election in ’85, RAM was surprised
- week after: civil disobedience = economy dropped
o RAM decided to push through with the Malacanang ambush
 If Marcos resists, they can assassinate him
 Would be a military junta (original plan, NOT democratic)

SERIES OF EVENTS:
1. RAMboys were found out by Ver’s men
2. it was the presidential guard RAMboys that Ver found out
3. RAMboys confessed their plan
4. Enrile found out that they were discovered, had his wife call Cardinal Sin
5. Cardinal Sin didn’t do anything
6. Enrile called Ramos (previously OIC: Officer-in-charge)
a. Enrile was still Ramos’ boss at that time
7. Enrile told Ramos the situation they were in
8. decided to have a press conference
9. invited even foreign presses (Feb 22, 1986); scheduled around 5 pm that Saturday
10. said they would be drawing their support from Marcos and would support Cory Aquino as president
11. seemed like Ramos and Enrile made the foreign press their human shields
12. When Cardinal Sin heard what was going on in the press conference he said “protect our two friends” through Radio veritas
13. Feb 22 (At night) Enrile transferred to Krame from Camp Aguinaldo
14. People started going to EDSA
15. Feb 23: EDSA Revolutions
16. the more Marcos sent combat teams, the more people kept their ground
17. Feb 25: Marcos called Washington to talk to Reagan
a. Reagan refused to talk to him; Paul Laxalt said “cut and cut cleanly”
18. Marcos family started packing in malacanag
19. Marcos had himself inaugurated that morning in Malacanang balcony
20. they were evacuated by US helicopter and went to Clark Air Base with Danding: went to Hawaii
21. Aquino was inaugurated in the “historic Club Filipino”  brief inauguration
22. Democracy of the people by the people

ESSAY QUESTIONS:
1. describe the tension between the executive and legislative branches in various periods from 1898 to 1972. What are the particular causes of this conflict in the Malolos Republic, the American Era, the third Phil. Republic? Why did this tension make Martial law possible?
2. Compare and contrast the economic elites during the American period, post-independence Philippines and the period under martial law. What caused their cohesion, disintegration and emasculation?
3. Why was post-war Philippines called the anti-thesis of the Commonwealth? In what ways was the martial law era similar to the commonwealth in terms of state strength, and in what other ways was it different?

i just hate how...

when im down and troubled and need some loving care,
i EAT!

ugh. ate TOO much again today and i feel so guilty about it.. to think dinner time hasnt even come yet.

on another note, ALTP actually is more fulfilling than i thought it would be. who would have thought that packing medicine for five straight hours with paraplegics could be fun!

when i grow up, i STILL want to put up my own outreach community.


and on yet another note, DON'T YOU JUST LUUUUUURRRRVVVEEEEE the weather?!?!?! =) =)

just came back from another YE retreat. gosh! talk about being outnumbered! we were around 30-35 in the working team, tyring to accomodate 70 candidates! ARE WE TIRED. all in all, i probably got 4 hours of sleep in two nights, zero amount of rest, a wounded leg, a tired and extra-large other leg from strain and ginormous eyebags... oh ya, add in the no-voice-syndrome and an extra large belly from eating too much to try and stay awake and energetic. (*WOOT WOOT*) 

but really... i wouldnt have had it any other way. in the last two years that i have been serving at church, i learned more than i have in my entire life. i learned about struggling, about finding comfort in others, about being broken in order to be made whole again, about seeing Christ in others, about finding the true joy in song and the true bliss that is praise. and i know i might sound all preachy, but i really dont find any other solace and no greater high, peace and love than i do in church. in service, more specifically. 

it's funny how God really turns your life around and makes you experience so much in pain in order to really find beauty in that pain and just grow from it. it's funny also how He will break you at every expense in order just ot find him in your troubles. i love HIm. that's all i can say. and if finding Him means breaking everyday in order to experience the bliss of serving Him and being provided with the best the best the absolute BEST family of friends that He's blessed me with, i'd break everyday just to seek Him again.

"You tore the veil, 
You made a way,
when You said that it is done..."

i love you, God. 
youth, i love youuuu sooooo much!
i couldnt have asked for any greater family than this =)




youth praise, i love youuu!!


in Your hands, i lay my spirit


being fools for God


the 70 or so candidates


anointing


I'm coming back to the Heart of Worship,
and it's all about You, Jesus.


it's cheesy, i know.. but you're a blessing =)


the greatest worship for the Lord


praise band minus mac on drums, kath on piano, ton on bongos 
and lau on tambourine 


my beloved youth praise again!

I LOVE THE YOUTH!!!
praise God :)

i was just talking to anna the whole way home. GOSH! i miss that girl sooooo much! im soooo glad things are back to ummm... when was that? highschool? hahaha! but seriously, im SO glad we're the way we are again, banany! LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH, YOUUU!

we started talking about the future. about how great it would be to get married, settle down and have kids. all that jazz, really.
but i don't know, now it got me thinking. i'm starting to plan my life now. and not just plan my life the way i am in college and what i want to do with work after, i mean plan my life in such a way that i'm really living it out purposely. as vague as that sounds, it's kinda personal, but ya. and the thing is, i know things will change. after all, when does it not, right? i could think i'm supposed to be doing this now when in the future, your whole world turns around and in the end, you're not meant for that. 

how can anyone tell what they're here for? 
how can everyone want to be great, want to be rich and famous when there are no standards for that anyway.
i wrote something once and it only struck me now how much i think about non-consequential things like this. i guess i just love to daydream. for the heck of it (and becuase i just cant seem to get it out of my head) i'll jot it down. 
maybe after, i'll feel there's a sense in having written it down in the first place.

_{I wonder what it feels like to end it.}
I'm not suicidal, don't worry.
but time is fleeting, i'm so young still.
At least i know they say time is fleeting.
there's comfort in knowing you're meant for greater things.
even if it's not meant to be in this lifetime.
maybe some people's purpose in life is not to be great
but to be stepping stones for the next person's greatness.
maybe some people aren't meant to be answers
but are me to be questions leading to those answers.
how would it feel to know you're just the question?
i want to be great.
i want to find answers.
i want to discover that treasure.
and not be the stepping stone leading to it.
maybe that's why i'm tired of life sometimes
not because i'm selfish and want to experience everything
but maybe becuase i'm proud and want to know everything.
but time is fleeting. i'm so young still.
at least i know time is fleeting. 
you make me happy,
you know that, right?
i'm not proud i promise.
i love you love and love is nothing short of selfishness.
i promise, i love. i love to love.
i'm understanding how to keep asking questions
and not finding answers.
did i ever tell you i love skies?
it's cos it's infinite.
you can swim peacefully in the infinite and always feel great.
come. let's fly in the sky. okay, at least lie under it and stare. 
see, im smiling? it means i'm happy that you're here.
allow me my moments of restlessness please.
there's beauty in confusion.
it's harder to be the question.
questions lead to so many other questions.
answers just concentrate on one question.
a "why?" always leads to "how come?"
to "What happened?"
to "where, when, whom?"
an answer always just leads to a "because."
okay, so maybe there are no such things as stepping stones,
jsut instruments of greatness.
there's too much to think about, too little time.
why?
time is fleeting, so what?
why?
okay. maybe i should just look at the sky.
no one can find answers in why.

i promise i'm not psycho. i just reflect too much, i guess.
i'm happy! i'm loved and happy and peaceful and calm =)
i think i've been watching Moulin Rouge too much...
ack, better get back to work.
questions, questions, questions

i havent updated my blog in the longest time and this time wont be any different...
it's just septmber 10... just september 10. 
hey, lemon sherbet? 
remember outside my house?
remember when i "lied?"
hay. thank you.

we'll be eating lemon sherbet til the end of time.

i'm feeling loved cos of youuuuuu!!!!!
and like i said, it's not theirs cos it's ours to begin with.
let's waste time chasing cars =)

is it just me? or are you missing the sun too?

i woke up today feeling blah. this mtv internship isn't doing much for me. apart from the few events im heading, everyday is such a burden. summer doesnt feel like summer with this internship. it's such a burden. PLUS the fact that it's unnecessary and im not getting paid, a 9am-7pm job is just. UGH. i want out now. im gonna intern next summer anyway. but i can't blame them. i mean, i relaly am jsut an intern staying here for a while. i can't complain. i LOVE mtv but not this job right now.. oh well, caramel. there will be better days =)

i honestly dont know why i decided to get into this so soon. i wanna hang out with friends (which i cant cos when i get home, im SO exhausted from the day, i just wannt plop into bed and relax), i wanna exercise (Cos ive been gaining weight just sitting down at the office, WAITING for something to do), i wanna go out with YOU (which i cant cos you have the play and cant come over), i wanna visit erika (which i cant also cos of previous reasons), i wanna dive (which i can only do at night. boo. im tired by then), i wanna be with the youth and help out with the play SO badly (but i cant. UGH!!!!) and i just wanna bum around this summer before school picks up again. i wish people in this place were huggable. i used to get 8 hugs a day. i hardly get any now apart from my sister who, by the way, i shove into my arms so i dont know if that counts.

im dying to do something productive.
gawd, i wish i didnt have to feel so low next to my siblings all the time. THAT bites.

but on a more positive note, diving this weekend with family for the first time. im excited for that! i just hope this sickness im starting to feel doesnt hit me by that time. i dont mind diving and THEN getting sick. call me crazy but i actually DO wanna get sick jsut so i can get some rest. maybe that will feel like summer ;)

NOTE: who knows if im just feeling this now.. i wouldnt know. maybe its just cos i feel myself with a fever. im tired. tomorrow's another day and i cant wait for it! too bad its only 10 am.

from now on. FRIENDS ONLY.
reply to this if you want me to add you up! =p

oh gosh oh gosh oh gosh OH GOSH!!!!
i just found out i was exempted in an exam i REALLY REALLY did not want to take! AT ALL!!! and this exam, GOSH!!!!!!! =D =D =D =D that's all i can say... GOSH!!! i'm sooooo happy!!!!

its funny how when you really REALLY just surrender, everything falls into place...
i'm trying not to be too worried now about everything else. i know the key to success.
...and it's not all me. =)

... im totally breaking out cos of STRESS.


summer, when will i see you?


*NOTE: i LOVE hugs. if i see you... please? i'd love one.






*DISCLAIMER: this NOTE does not apply to dirty old men, perverts, maniacs, dirty boys riding bad bikes, old japanese fat men even if i think they have cute eyes, dead emperors, goofy-haired nerds (though nerds CAN be hot), bald headed platypuses (cos those animals freak me out), mimes (for personal reasons), italian scruffy bar tenders (other personal reasons), victoria beckham - cos she's taken my husband away from me too long, ms diyco (because she's ruining my life but today she can hug me cos she was fairly nice), garbage boys, trash boys (essa, TRASH BOYS) oh and white-faced reincarnated theater people --it's cos of u that i can't sleep at night.

im tired of feeling like nothing turns out right
im tired of feeling worthless
im tired of being compared
im tired of trying so hard and not getting anywhere near you want to be
im tired of failure
im tired of rejection
im tired of worrying and wanting and not finding my place
im tired of wishing people would see but really dont
im tired of trying to impress
im tired of not wanting what i want and going for what i want
im tired of feeling forced
im tired of not even understanding me
im tired of putting blame on people me included
im tired of thinking
im tired of reflecting
im tired of this earth
i wont kill myself.
not even close to thinking about it.
but i really am tired now.

there's nothing like singing and loving what you sing.
heck, there's nothing like singing =)

noy asked me the other night when we had dinner what my happy place was.
immediately, i said it was the stage! i just love it!!

guys, watch our "ONE WAY" play. i dont know whats gonna happen, but its coming.
watch watch watch watch watch watch! its an entirely original musical made by the youth. ENTIRELY ORIGINAL that means frmo the story to the script, to the lyrics and the music to the acting and technical stuff to the costume and props and set to the directing and the producing and the scheduling of stuff. basta, ALL YOUTH STUFF!!!

one way. You're the only one that i could live for =D

it's been a while since i've updated this livejournal.. most of them were thoughts. thoughts for myself and thoughts i just needed to air, basically. okay, for all of you who i havent seen or talked to in the longest time, here's what's been going on in my life. in brief, of course ;)

spent new years in HK with family.
been working on writing things for the youth play.
studying my ass off to reach that cum laude/summa that i want when i graduate.
bonding with friends.
spending time with you. =)
teasing my sister and just laughing crazy with her.
church. God = <3
friends = <3
missing bobsie. (BOBS!!! this is a shout out to you cos i miss you!)
umm... advertising sucks cos diyco sucks. but boo. c'est la vie!
getting sick, being sick. always sick.. which also sucks!

not much to think of, really.
today was a pretty fun! considering i've been sick the past few days, i was thinking about not going to the meeting at erika's house for Social Anthropology. i LOVE the south, dont get me wrong about that, but sometimes i wish i lived up north with everyone. or better yet, everyone else lived down ehre to make life less difficult.
moving on, i decided to go and be prpductive and just rest there if ever. THANK GOD I WENT! i miss those girls SOOOOO much!!! it was like sex and the series with us cos seriously, we're all just like that. hahaha! as ditzy as that sounds, i LURVE those girls: weese, viv, es, I LOVE YOU BABES! =D
we got work done AND spent the entire afternoon just laughing and bonding. might i add, im extremely sticky now from being licked everywhere by pearl, erika's dog. such a cutie! =)
now im home and carlo's coming in a while to pick me up to go to my friend's party in libis. yay! im allowed =)

so far, life is good. aside frm the few bumps, things are going great =)
and i know you read this sometimes, thanks for making me happy =)

...i <3 the world right now =)

my thoughts are so thick, so heavy, so light, so fine. it's tense inside my head. you can slice it with a knife. i hate how you can't control your thoughts and your emotions sometimes. that's just not fair.

on a lighter note, God, i love you =)

A-crying
G- oh ada! pourquoi tu es la? tu-as probleme?
A- (crying) bon ben... no, pas de probleme.
(cries more intensely)
G- pourquoi, ada?
A- cries even more
G- viens, ici
A- c'est luigi, mon cheri. il a une affaire avec nikki.
G- sacre bleu!! QUOI??? ca, ca, c'est vrai??? nooo...
A- oui!!! c'est tres TRES mal et *cries* c'est trest TRES vrai.. (waaaahhhh)
G- sshhh.. c'est pa la fini du monde, mon amie.. je sais, c'est tres mal mais, alors, viens ici.
(english: ssshhh.. its not the end of the world, my friend. i know. it's very horrible but, hay, come here *and then big hug*)
A- merci, merci, giannina.
G- pourquoi tu as beaucoup des baggages? tu vas ou maintenant?
A- je vais le boite du Ibiza en avion.
G- d'accord, d'accord. merd. luigi, le batard, luigi!
A- *cries even more* je suis desolee, giannina. merci, mais je parti pour l'aeroport.
G- ah, bon voyage, ada. tu me telephone, ok? (Call me, ok?)
A- oui, oui.. merci, giannina. au revoir! *cries a bit while leaving*

done, dear! =)

i am starting to feel the christmas spirit. caroling last night was a BLAST despite it having been a rocky day to begin with. its funny how thigns just fall into place. somehow, they always do :)

to all those people who've been with me good times and bad. I LOVE YOU!!!

taken from kathy's site:

here's to more christmas cheer, santa hats, tears, prayers, worship, camwhoring, music-sharing, laughtrips, pig outs and friendly-family-bondings. I LOVE YOU, GUYS!!!!

it's done.

i love you, dico.

SOOOOO much.

i thought i was okay... i thought i everything was fine. until you start to fall again and it hits you hard. just like it always does, just like you always need to fall to rise.

thank you kathy. thank you carlo. i needed this time of prayer to be with God to realize that there are reasons for pain and suffering, that thorns are blessings and hurt is healthy, that sorrow is sacred and sin can be made pure. thank you for reminding me how to cry, how have a good cry and come out of it cleansed and renewed. thank you for allowing me to see Christ in others and for allowing myself to be used for something greater. for allowing me to feel like i've never felt before, for allowing me to sing like i've never sung before, for allowing me to kneel and to beg and to just let my spirit soar. there's nothing like being at peace when you feel there's no peace left in the world. there's nothing like accepting pain and being grateful for pain. there's nothing like thanking God for fear not because fear is good but because fear reminds us of Whom we have to turn back to. thanks for sharing quiet time with me and allowing me to heal, allowing us to heal.

there really is no higher sacrifice than a man who gives His life for me.
and once again, i feel hope... despite all struggles, there's hope.

thanks for making me see again. and breathe.

it's funny how life can be such a game.
it's funny how you think you're okay,
then you break.
...but you know you're okay.
gonna be okay.

it's funny how you cry.
is it even right to say you can cry in a good way?
to flood yourself in tears?
there are so many times when it just pours,
when you just want to cry, just want to release, just want to emotionally escape, just delete all feeling and cleanse yourself pure again.

just stop.
stop crying.
wish you had no tears left to shed, wish your face no longer served as a manifestation of your pain. wish you didn't have to feel so stupid,
so lost
so hurt
anymore.
wish you could stop the heartburn, escape from all fear, remove all reminders of your grief...
and drown in your own flood.
then.

can you say you had a
good
cry,
wanting to delete the
very
reason
why you did?
yet still knowing everything you gained from it?

and through it all, you know there's NO GREATER LOVE THAN THIS.
through it all, tears don't always have to seem so heavy. at least you KNOW someday they won't be.

last night was SO much fun!!!! we had our last pig out session for the break before we OFFICIALLY begin our diets.. so that means today. but i had popcorn. okay. no dinner. REALLY. nothing na from this time today.. no food intake, i SWEAR. really. dammit.

why must i love food so much? its killing me.

there's nothing like good friends, good food, good music, good christmas spirit and good times. thanks noy, gian, leo, lau, jace, chris, chase, ton, mon, ina, kaisie, pisha, choy, carlo, guel, carlos, tin. that was SO MUCH FUN. seriously. SO MUCH FUN. thanks for coming at 730pm. thanks for pigging out with me and REALLY P-I-G-GGING OUT!!!! promise, we wont do this in a while. it'll be SO unhealthy if we do. hahaha! such baboy kids but we rock at it! =D thanks for the good talks. thanks for the good laughs. for the balderdash game. for the girl talks. for the dancing. for the pigging out again. for the goofing around. for the pigging out again. for laughing off the fact that we were still up when my parents came down the next morning for breakfast. for staying til 5am. for the thank you's. THANKS GUYS!!

i'll see you all tonight.
fun!!! =D

but, DAMMIT!! why is it that when you OFFFICIALLY start ur diet its so much easier to break it and just eat? ugh.

but still.. too much love to spoil anything. whee =)